If I remember correctly (and I was young, so my memory could be skewed? but I doubt it) when we shopped at either Kroger or Piggly Wiggly - for every dollar you spent, you got a stamp with the value of a penny - every 10 dollars, you'd get a ten cent stamp? Anyway - a ridiculously low amount of stamps for the money you spent. Maybe it was a 10% ratio? I don't rightly recollect, but I DO RECALL one day, I must have asked my mom about this huge bag of green stamps she had. (And when I say huge bag, I'm not talking about a little ziplock bag, or even a gallon sized ziplock bag, I don't even think those were invented back then, but I'm talking about a grocery bag, and again - not your standard grocery bag...the BROWN PAPER BAG - because I don't think the plastic grocery bag with handles had yet been invented...but I do remember when they were invented because back then they gave you a choice "paper or plastic" whereas now, they dis-invented paper. Can't find a paper grocery bag anywhere...try it! I don't know what to drain my meatballs on - but I digress....)
So picture a brown paper grocery bag full of S&H green stamps - IN THE RAW - meaning - the combined value of said stamps were undetermined because as of yet, they had not been affixed to an S&H Green stamp BOOK (see picture above) It was my job, as a 5 year old (maybe I was older?) to organize these stamps into books - they were the kind of stamps that you had to lick. I remember because I had to lick them all - to get them to stick in the book. This was before self-adhesive was invented.
So as a four year old - who was highly intelligent - yet talked too much (if you can even IMAGINE me talking too much...) my mother kept my mouth busy by sitting me in front of our radio (this was WELL before cable was invented) and licking these stamps. Now, I must have been a highly intelligent 3 year old - because each page on the book had different value systems. I believe you could fill the page with penny stamps, or half of the page with 5 cent stamps - or one row of the page with 10 cent stamps. So...(and this is where it could get confusing for a 2 1/2 year old) you could put 5-one cent stamps and then two rows minus one 5 cent stamps - or two five cent stamps and then a row minus a ten cent stamps - but under no circumstances were you allowed to put 3 five cent stamps and rip one of the ten cent stamps in half. I had to write that on the board a hundred times - my mom was strict about wasting the S&H green stamps....
Anyway - so the ultimate goal of collecting all these green stamps & books was that you could go to the S&H green stamp store and BUY whatever you wanted - the more books you saved, the more items - or nicer items - or bigger items you could "purchase" - If I remember correctly (and I always do) I had filled 326 books of these S&H stamps. (I remember this because part of the educational system in Texas was to find any number and divide it by two, then add 3, divide it by 2 again - repeat those steps until you come up with your age - that's how I remember I was about three years old.)
As a reward for licking all the stamps and putting them in the books, I got to go with my mom to the S&H store (plus - I think I Had to, because the babysitter didn't take S&H books as payment) I remember that day clearly - I was so excited when we finally had enough books to buy a square yellow sponge, so I no longer had to lick stamps.
Now, I can see my mother reading this and objecting about making me lick all those stamps - but I remember it clearly - I was a very skinny child. I didn't eat a lot of sweets, by choice, but I didn't eat a lot of anything else, on the count of my tongue always sticking to the roof of my mouth - and I also remember after cashing in all those books - I didn't have any more green stamps to lick - so I was able to eat solid foods again - and I ate a whole lot - my uncles would tease me about being able to put an entire pancake in my mouth in one bite - I'd fold it up into a little square piece and open my mouth real wide - it fit (we were poor, the pancakes were watered down and were more like crepe's anyway - so it was doable) And the first time my aunt saw me do that she said, "My goodness, Heidi, I can't believe you can eat so much - you're so skinny! Where do you put all those calories?" and truth be told - I'm not sure what I answered her, but I have recently discovered what I did with all those calories I ate when I was younger...I stored them in my late 30's.
3 comments:
bwahahahahahahaaaa
I like how you kept getting younger - 5, 4, 3 ... I kept waiting for the part where newborn Heidi emerged with an armful of perfectly filled Green Stamps books and bought her own crib.
I totally remember those stamps! And putting them into books!
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