My first stripper

Four previous children, all managed to keep their clothes on. Brynn, I have to follow around like a hawk!

She is pre-two.

Too much work for you.

She likes bare bums.

Swinging her arms as she hums.

She will not wear socks.

As she empties the wipie box.

She will not wear pants.

Should be locked on with clamps.

She will not wear a diaper.

Which is bad if she needs a wiper.

What can you do with that pinchable bum?

Just run up and get me some.

I'm So McTicked!!!

We don't frequent McArtery Clogger much - but tonight - well the kids were begging and I thought -what the heck - I don't really McCare...so I got the McHowie & McKali a few McMeals - and OH MY McGOSH - one of the toys in there is this ugly cat that has one elbow out and the other hand is under the armpit & every time you pull the McElbow down, the cat thingy makes a McFART sound!

Okay - so it's funny, but not acceptable for a 6 & 7 year old child AT THE DINNER TABLE!!!

Roller blading

I'm sure my donkey got the workout of her life today. I went roller blading and my donkey was BURNING! I went about 1/4 the distance I normally run - took about the same amount of time (including the 3 minute sit down & look for my breath break) burned the same number of calories! WOW!

I'm sure a neighbor could have recorded me for AFV and he'd win the money, if only he knew my name!

Watch out flabby donkey, I'm bringin' in the stallion! Oh gyal, tuck in yoh donkay! At's rat.

Worn out

I guess I'm tired. It's a lot of work home schooling, but I feel like it's rewarding. I love the look Ross gives when it clicks! I enjoy remembering math! I love to refresh my memory with history and other things as we go through his lesson plans! Rossi loves being home schooled. Dh hasn't asked about how it's going, but he asked Rossi tonight who told him he day-dreams more at home than he does at school. I can understand that, but he also does twice as much here as he does at school. He doesn't have to wait for another classmate to "get it" before he moves on to the next subject. He goes at his own pace & he tells me that he enjoys it.

But when Dh tells me that...I don't know - I wonder if he understands what we do here. He hasn't asked how it's going. I can't get any housework done - and Brynn is sad she's no longer the "only child" at home. I can't get the house clean enough to discern if I need to fix anything up to get it ready to sell. I'm worn out. I feel unappreciated and don't feel like I've done anything during the day.

Maybe I'm just hormonal. I call my mom to see if she has any advice for being stressed out & she keeps asking what my point is for calling her. So my girlfriend's mom died after a 3 week sickness. She was 38 weeks pregnant when her mom died. Of course I was sad for her, what a terrible situation - what a quick unexpected death. She tells me her mom was her rock. So I think I need to call my mom and maybe try on a relationship with her - but all I get is "why did you call me? what do you need? Hurry, I have to go finish being verbally abused by my favorite children."

Just tired.

Belly Nuh Bang - can you translate it for me?

my girl tuck in yuh belly
i beg yuh tuck in yuh belly
ah weh yuh ah go wid dat man?
tuck in yuh side
(chorus)
from yuh know yuh belly noh bang
and yuh know seh yuh look good ina yuh thong gyal
skin out! yuh belly look clean and yuh know yuh fit ina magazine.
yuh see it. (bruk out, bruk out!)
from yuh know yuh belly noh bang
and yuh know seh yuh look good ina yuh thong gyal (goodas gyal!)
skin out! yuh belly look clean and yuh know yuh fit ina magazine

verse 1
some gyal belly bag over like shirt
one bag ah flab dem need some ab work
big butt and big gut gyal dat noh work
and mi nah even smile nor smirk
yuh fi tek care ah yuh self gyal
know what yuh worth
yuh belly noh fi look like seh yuh ah give birth
yuh foot favour broomstick,
don't wear skirt mi gyal mogle, mogle
yuh noh shape like di earth (never!)
walk out, skyjuice ah noh yuh daddy mogle
pon ah gyal yuh belly flat like bammy
yuh cute and sexy, round up like tammy
ah you win di flat belly grammy. mi gyal!

(chorus)
verse 2
from yuh know seh yuh look good deborah
yuh skin noh marky and stripe up like zebra
hold up yuh hand from yuh hot like peppa
walk through di dance yuh ah real hot steppa (mi gyal!)
from yuh know seh yuh have flat belly
yuh hot ina yuh swimsuit like kriss kelly
when yuh ah walk it nah shake like jelly
up ina di video and talk up shelly (woi ah!)
(chorus)
repeat verse 1
(chorus)

Dr.'s appt. Friday; 1:30

He was shocked I was still walking around instead of delivering a baby. I didn't feel any contractions or labor or anything - just a regular doctor's appt. 2 weeks before my due date. The doctor informed me that I was dialated to a 6 and fully effaced. Said he'd meet me at the hospital in a few minutes.

Whatever...So I went back home to do the dishes and get a babysitter for Rossi (Ann-Marie came over) - clearly his powerful suggestions that I was in labor got to me, and I went back to the hospital.

The nurse there checked me and said "I need a room, STAT" we reminisced for a few more minutes, when she stuck her head out the curtain again - and yelled "WHY don't I have a room for her yet?" They brought me to my room.

I asked my nurse to order the epidural...and started to play gin rummy with Ross. A few minutes later, I asked where the epi was...(very calmly) the nurse said she didn't think I needed one because I was so calm, so she didn't order one. I told her, in my calmest voice "The reason I'm calm is because I've ordered an epidural, you don't want to disappoint me, I can turn vicious on a dime."

The epidural came, but it was pointless. The doctor walked in to say hello and "see, told ya you'd be back" He gave me a catheter - wrote his name with my pee (man thing, I'm sure) - I was a 7 - I had only been at the hospital 37 minutes, I told him I felt like I was ready to push...he said, "If that's what you wanna do, go for it" (I go from 7-10 in .2 seconds) at 4:35p.m., out came my 125 pound 11 year old daughter....WTH? That's what happens when you blink, I guess?

Christmas summary

So I'm keeping this blogger as sort of a family history/journal type thing...I wonder if one day I'll forget it's here & it will be deleted forever. I'm sure it's in the term of use, however, who really ever reads those things...it's like that little snippit at the end of Dharma & Greg from Chuck Lowry - or whatever his name is - apparently you really have to be curious enough to record it and then pause it so you can read - and he's a funny dude...it's like his own blogger on TV for all to read, but you have to record & play back then pause it. So when I'm old & grey, or just plain dead - will this be around for my posterity and friends to read? And will they think I'm a dork because I spell grey, not gray, and really - did you learn in school homonym class which to use where? It's all so confusing. I'm just typing to see what my "new and improved google" blog looks like. I have no opinion. Doesn't look too different to me.

My new favorite scripture...

D&C 18:35-36 "It is my voice which speaketh [the scriptures] unto you; for they are given by my spirit unto you, and by my power you can read them one to another; and save it were by my power you could not have them; Wherefore, you can testify that you have heard my voice, and know my words."

What a powerful testimony we could be to the world with that knowledge.

We took the kids to the Mesa Temple to see the Christmas lights - inside the visitor's center we sat at the foot of the Christus and heard words from Christ. Later, we watched the "Luke 2" video. It's times like this that I really miss Grandma Nancy. She loved being there.

Froze my donkey off!!

We took the kids to Flagstaff this weekend to go sledding! What a fun thing that turned into. Brynn didn't like the cold, to say the least, but she loved eating the snow - we just set her in a fresh patch of white only & let her dine!

and Howie really got into sledding. He would stay on that sled no matter WHAT! What a serious sportsman!!

Rossi found a really cool jump!

Kiersten tried to make a snowman out of dry snow and a special Thanks to Kiersten for teaching me that freezing my ass off isn't nearly as cool as freezing my donkey off!

Here's Kali just being her cute little self - looking a little sassy, don't you think? They had a ton of fun - I could post pictures till the cows came in - maybe more tomorrow!

This'll keep you up at night....

the speed of light is not an actual speed, but the distance it takes light to travel in a year...go to a planatarium and they'll tell you something about a super nova, and there was a big explosion of a solar system or star...and how we can't see it yet because the light hasn't reached our viewing, so we're still seeing the star - but in a thousand years, we'll witness the explosion that happened 2 thousand years ago...so here's my deep thought...if there's another planet in another light system in a galaxy far far away - and they're zoomed in on the planet earth, at such a close rate they could see details on the planet, will they think us primitive still driving around in cars as they watch me attend my first day of kindergarten 3000 years from now?